Songs in the Night

This week marks eight years since the sudden and unexpected passing of my late husband Winston. That was a strange land for me. The land of loss and death. At first I needed to hear others sing because the song in my heart was frozen with grief and I was traumatized. I’d sing God’s song later with help from others. There were tapes I listened to that reminded me of the Lord’s song. It was the voice on the radio or the television that told me God would bring me out of these trials. It was the voice of my mother telling me and reminding me of God’s faithfulness to me in the past.

How could I sing the Lord’s song in a strange land? In the next phase on my journey through grief after the sudden death of my husband I tried to sing along with those who were on the journey with me At first I’d only get a few words out before the tears started to flow. I kept trying day after day to sing along. I was reminded of God’s word. I was strengthened by constantly hearing the words of faith and truth. I kept tunneling towards the daylight.

One day I started to sing without the cd’s or videos. I started to hear a hum in my Spirit and heart. I started to venture a song. I was still in a strange land- the death was real the pain was real, the separation was real. But somewhere deep inside my heart hope was stirred and renewed.

One day I found myself spontaneously singing a song of praise and worship. My spirit was being released. After singing I thought my , my I was just singing. Could it be, true? Yes, after a number of months I was enabled to sing the Lord’s song in that strange land? Since that time my song has been released and I can witness that my intense sorrow has turned to joy.

To appoint unto them that mourn in Zion, to give unto them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness; that they might be called trees of righteousness, the planting of the Lord, that He might be glorified
Isaiah 61:3